Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Teaser Tuesday

Teaser time! In this one, Callie's having a conversation with Chase's mom, Linda, who doesn't like her because she inadvertently put her son in a wheelchair Plus, Linda knows Callie's aunt, Moira, and assumes that Callie as just as removed from reality as Moira is. Olivia and Lexi are Chase's sisters.

Again, it will take me awhile to read the teasers, but I definitely will.

---

Moira has a guy over.

He must’ve come last night, because I hear her say, “You didn’t have to get my breakfast,” on the other side of the wall. Then there’s some talk about how, yes, he did have to get her breakfast because she’s so amazing and beautiful and how she can’t possibly be forty (which is true because she’s forty-six.) Gag me.

But it’s kind of nice.

Moira says that he’s just the sweetest guy in the world and, “I can’t believe you walked in the snow for me.”

I get out off bed and run to the window so quickly that I nearly trip over my feet.

I see white.

I need to see Chase.

I run down the stairs to his apartment—in my infamous duck pajamas—and bounce as I wait for someone to answer the door since I’m now on a wow-there’s-white-crap-on-the-ground adrenaline rush.

Olivia, Lexi, or Chase could've answered the door, but of course Linda is the one who does. She says hi and how are you, I say I’m good and how are you and she says she’s fine.

Then, we stand there. I’m still bouncing a little. “I’m here to see Chase,” I say.

She nods which means nothing to me. “He’s asleep.”

“This is really important.”

She waits for an explanation, or for me to confess that I’m out to destroy her son’s life, I’m not really sure which. “It’s snowing,” is my explanation.

She waits some more.

What do I tell her? Chase and I need to dance in the snow because once we danced in the cold together and it made us both feel alive and he didn’t wear a shirt and you raised a really hot son, congratulations? “I need to see him,” is my makeshift answer. “Because this will make him happy. I promise.”

That does it. She tells me to come in and points me to Chase’s room.

15 comments:

Ellen said...

Interesting tension at the end between her and the mom... I like that you can understand where both Callie and Linda are coming from, and sympathize with both of them

Glen Akin said...

Nice. Really, really nice. Can't wait for the follow up. And lol @ your MC bouncing

Unknown said...

I know I've said this before, but I really like Callie. You've written her quite well. She just feels real...like someone I know. Nice tease!

Unknown said...

"I’m now on a wow-there’s-white-crap-on-the-ground adrenaline rush" has to be my pick of the week for awesome descriptions XD

I love the Chase and Callie saga, they're so adorable!

Angie said...

Love that last paragraph, and the white crap on the ground was awesome. I love the first snow too. :)

Caitlin R. O'Connell said...

I LOVE the infamous duck pajamas. Your character's voice is just great!

Lia Victoria said...

This is so adorable! And the last paragraph is perfect, to me :] Nice voice and descriptions!

Angelica R. Jackson said...

Good tension, especially the dialogue where half the conversation the mom is not really saying anything, but her silence tells us so much.

bethany griffin said...

I really like the last paragraph.

juli said...

Like everyone else said - the tension in this scene was great. And confession: I usually hate YA that's written in first person, present tense, but I LOVED this. Callie's voice is just the right combination of sweet and snark, and totally relatable.

I especially loved this part:
"What do I tell her? Chase and I need to dance in the snow because once we danced in the cold together and it made us both feel alive and he didn’t wear a shirt and you raised a really hot son, congratulations?"

Wonderful!! :)

karen yuan said...

Arghh hurry up and finish your book so you can publish it so I can READ THE WHOLE THING. Because I love this.

This line --> "Because this will make him happy" and how only then did Linda let her in spoke loads, in my opinion, of Callie's and Linda's personalities.

Karla Calalang said...

Callie seems like such a great MC. I love her. She's cute and fun. I can't wait to see how dancing in the snow will be like for them! :)

Noelle said...

I love your MC's voice! She's so sarcastic and snarky, but I LOVE it! Because that's really what goes on in a teenager's head. Great job!

I especially loved the bit where she doesn;t know what to say to Linda. "You raised a hot son, congratulations." Priceless!

Good job!

~Noelle

Marieke said...

Love the last paragraph, great tension, great characterization :D

Brianne Carter said...

Ellen - I'm glad you can understand and sympathize with both of them. Thanks!

Glen - Thank you!

Karla - I get so excited whenever someone says they love Callie. Thank you!

Caitlin - Whee, and I'm always so bad at description :P Thank you!

Angie - Yeah, I love the first snow then end up hating the rest lol. Thanks!

Caitlin - The duck PJs are pretty much a character at this point, so I'm glad you like them lol. Thank you :)

Lia - Yay, thanks!

Angelica - Thank you!

Bethany - Thanks :)

Juli - Whee new BFF, I love converting people to first person present lol. Thanks you!

Karen - K WILL DO. Thanks!

Karla - Like I said to...Karla lmao, I love that people love Callie. Thanks!

Noelle - Glad you like the voic! Thanks!

Marieke - Thank you!

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