I worked at a daycare over the summer. I experienced the following scenario countless times:
Child ("A") is misbehaving.
Me: A, bring your toy to a table. When you show that me you can play nicely, I'll let you join your friends again.
A goes to the table. Five seconds pass.
A: Bwianne/M'anne/Ain (Brianne is apparently a difficult name for three year olds), I'm playing nicely!
Me: Show me that you're playing nicely. I'll tell you when you can come play, don't worry.
Ten seconds pass.
A: I'm playing nicely!
Me: Show me. I can't know that you're playing nicely unless I see you play nicely.
Three guesses to what happened next, and the first two don't count. As frustrating as it was, it was also a Eureka moment for me. "Show, don't tell" was always a writing rule I struggled with, but kids, as they so often do, showed me how simple it is. They could tell me that they were playing nicely, and they may have been, but it didn't matter until I saw it. It's the same thing with your readers: unless you show them something, you can't expect them to believe it.
Of course, there are times when it's better to tell than it is to show, but I find that sometimes, showing instead of telling can make a huge difference.
Thoughts?
Monday, October 18, 2010
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4 comments:
At a SCBWI conference earlier this year, there was a good query workshop and the editor/speaker opened it up to questions afterwards. There were the usual questions, and then one woman raised her hand and gushed about how much she was getting from the conference. She was obviously in the epiphany stage, and many of us were smiling and nodding, having been there. But then she kept TELLING us how she felt. And kept telling us.
Which brings me to something a friend told me she does when she goes for school visits with her book: she opens the questions with a reminder, "A question starts with why, how, where, what, or who."
I wish I'd heard that before. I used to give zoo tours, and the question portion was inevitably taken over with comments like, "My grandpa has brown shoes," or "There's a dog near our house and his name is Sugar."
And BTW, I did lean over to my friend while the woman was talking, and murmur, "It sounds like someone never learned that a question starts with why, how..." And soda nearly came out of my friend's nose, but she managed to suppress it and remain professional.
Great example - so true! :D
Angelica, love yours too! :D
I love this! Thanks for sharing. :)
Angelica, that's a great example. I'll keep it in mind!
Marieke and Meredith, thank you!
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